


Girl Talk

by MikeJaffa



Category: Bakuretsu Tenshi | Burst Angel
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:53:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27338995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MikeJaffa/pseuds/MikeJaffa
Summary: Inspired by Burst Angel chibi art: Has Meg’s apparent dislike for Kyo actually concealed something else?
Comments: 2
Kudos: 1





	Girl Talk

**Author's Note:**

> AUTHOR’S NOTE: I will own up to this being the most messed up Burst Angel fic idea I have ever had! But one of my current ideas, still in outline form, has led me to examine Kyo and Meg’s relationship or lack thereof. I’ve been shipping Kyo and Sei since I saw BA on Netflix in 2013, and only ONCE had Kyo in an intimate situation with Meg. Even then, I wouldn’t think of them as a couple. But there’s a piece of chibi art in the DVD sets that shows Kyo daydreaming about Shiho Kazami (whom I had thought had friend zoned Kyo in episode 7) while in the background, Meg is furious. If you have the DVDs, you know what I’m talking about. Do the Japanese ship Kyo with MEG!? Or at least whoever did that art? If so, how could that be consistent with what happens in the show? Enter my silly muse, who rose from the depths of my subconscious on a caffeine high, and said, “Hold my diet soda.” If the first words in your review are something to the effect that this is really messed up, I am already there. But this is the only way to get it out.  
> DISCLAIMER: Gonzo owns the rights to Burst Angel. I am making no money off this fic. And if Gonzo ever does anything with BA again, hopefully it will be nothing like this. In fact, I pray to God it would be nothing like this.

“Jo, I trust you implicitly,” Sei said. “I do not doubt your word, nor have I ever doubted you. I hope you realize that.” She was sitting across from Jo at the trailer’s kitchen table.

Jo, for her part, had her typical impassive expression, as if there was nothing unusual about her arm being in a sling and having a black eye. “Yes, Sei, I know,” she said in her normal monotone. “We don’t always agree, but there is respect and trust between us.”

“Good. That said…I am having a serious problem with this, Jo. So why don’t you walk me through it again, slowly?”

“Sure.”

“All right. Let’s start at the beginning: Because of an unavoidable scheduling conflict on our part, Kyo was working here when he had promised to study with Shiho Kazami for a big test at the cooking school—apparently there’s textbook material he has to know. So I agreed to let them study here. Shiho arrived just as we finished dinner and had settled down to study with Kyo while you came up here to watch your TV. Everything was fine. Amy and I had to leave to examine Bailan’s cybersecurity systems. Why don’t you pick it up from there?”

“All right. After you left…” 

8

8

“They’re still at it,” Meg said as she came onto the roof of the trailer and sat down next to Jo.

Jo looked away from her TV and pulled out one of her earbuds. “Excuse me?”

“Still…” Meg made air quotes. “‘…studying.’”

“Kyo did say it was a big test.” She started to put the earbud back in.

“Oh, come on! Cooking? Kyo? The man of a thousand and one recipes?”

“My impression was that to do it professionally, there’s more to worry about than just memorizing recipes. And we’ve cost him a lot of class time. He has to do well on this test.”

“Well, yeah, but you know what he’s really doing?”

“All right, Meg, what is he really doing?”

“Trying to hit on Shiho! What else? I know how boys are, Jo. Studying is just an excuse.”

“First, I don’t think Kyo is that shallow. Second, you’ve never been to school, except for that one op--”

“No, I’ve been to school! I wasn’t always in that school bus. I was in and out of the system since I was seven. I’ve been to a bunch of schools. And I know what boys want.”

“Well, if he’s hoping for some…fringe benefits, good for him. Shiho is a nice girl.” Jo started to turn back to the TV.

“Yes, I suppose,” Meg said. “Nice…straight…in every sense of the word.” Meg held her hands a foot apart, palms facing each other, and moved her hands straight up and down.

Jo chuckled. “I think she’s a little curvier than that.”

“Oh, really?”

“Well, her clothes are more loose-fitting, and she generally prefers skirts that go down to her knees. So her curves aren’t accentuated, but they’re there. I would say she’s petite, and not flaunting what she has.”

“So…just more modest.”

“Right.” Jo put both earbuds back in.

She could still hear Meg: “Modest…reserved…shy…retiring.” Meg heaved a sigh. “Not very exciting.”

“Well, he probably gets more than enough ‘excitement’ with us,” Jo said. “I can understand why he might want to be with someone who’s the antidote to that, if that’s what he’s doing.”

“So you wouldn’t have a problem with that?”

“No!” Jo gestured at the TV. “Now, do you mind?”

“No, of course not. Watch your movie.”

Jo turned back to the TV.

Meg went on, “I mean it’s none of my business if Kyo wants to waist his time chasing a walking cure for insomnia with less curves than an ant hill.”

“No, it is--”

Shiho’s voice sounded from the door: “Hello? Jo?”

Jo said, “Come on up, Shiho!”

Shiho Kazami’s head poked through the door down into the trailer. “I’m going home now, but I just wanted to thank you for letting me come over and being such kind hosts. And when Sei gets back, please tell her ‘Thank you’ for me.”

Jo smiled and said, “Not a problem. Any friend of Kyo’s is a friend of mine. If you ever want to stop back, just ask Kyo and he’ll be able to tell you where we are. We move the trailer around, but Amy texts him the location.”

“Ok. Thanks. See you. Meg, good seeing you again.”

Meg smiled. “’Night, Shiho.”

Shiho went back down through the door. A few minutes later, they heard her descend the trailer’s steps. They watched her car pull away.

As they sat down again, Jo said, “Well, it looks like either Operation Hit On Shiho was a bust, or they just studied and now she’s gone home. Either way, no cause for concern.” She put the earbuds in.

Meg laughed it off. “Of course! It was a stupid thought. He’s not interested in her. Why should he be? It’s Sei he’s after.”

Jo didn’t look away from the TV. “Well, he does prefer to talk to her more than the rest of us.”

“Of course! She has the biggest boobs here, all-natural E-cups. And she’s sitting on a huge bankroll. Why go after Shiho when you can have that? And the way he fawns all over her? He’s got her eating out of his hands, literally and figuratively. You’ve seen how gooey and doe-eyed she gets.” Meg affected a vacuous expression: “‘Oh, Kyohei, you are such a good cook. And that special desert of yours is just heavenly!’ Yeah, I bet it is! Which he serves in her bedroom, right? Or maybe right in the cockpit while we’re out! Just lock Amy in her lab and then give the princess her ‘desert.’ And we have only his word he wants to go to France, but she buys it hook, line, and sinker. Ha! Hmmph! Huh! Ha! Humph! No doubt about it, Jo, we’ve got ourselves a player, a little teenage gigolo. Oh, yeah. I’ve got his number. I’m not fooled for one second.”

Jo looked at Meg and slowly took out the earbuds. “I don’t believe it,” she said.

“What?” Meg said.

“I didn’t think possi…Meg, you’re not into guys!”

“Where did you get that idea? I’ve had boyfriends.”

“When?”

“Before you. I told you, I was in and out of the system. I’ve been to school. I’ve had boyfriends. I just don’t want another one right now.”

“You don’t? Because it sounds to me like you like Kyo.”

“Well…I don’t…not…like him. He’s…an acquired taste. His honesty and reliability make up for him being such a pansy. I consider him a friend--”

“No, I mean you like him like him, boyfriend girlfriend like him, that kind of ‘like him.’”

“No! Don’t be ridiculous, Jo.”

“Meg, you’ve spent ten minutes chewing my ear off about Kyo and other women. Sounds to me like you’re jealous.”

“Me? Jealous? Of Kyo? What have you been smoking? That’s nuts. I am not interested in him in that way. No way.”

“You sound jealous to me.”

“I am not jealous. I’m concerned.”

“Concerned?”

“Yes, Jo, concerned.” 

“About what, Meg?”

“As a friend, I am concerned that he is limiting himself.”

“In what way?”

“I just think a young man in his prime should explore more of the opportunities around him.”

“Such as?”

“Well, Jo, I just think that in between the two extremes of the mob princess with the epic rack and the fellow student who’s flatter than a pancake there are possibilities he should explore. And furthermore—no offense—that there are ethnicities other than Asian. Variety is the spice of life, and he should sample the choices available to him, not just go one way or the other as if he has to pick one right now.”

“Hmm, let me think. Who do I know who’s not Asian, isn’t super rich, whose boobs aren’t ridiculously big—D cups if I remember correctly--and whom no one with at least four functioning brain cells would even think of calling boring? I know—Meg!”

“Oh, now I know you’re high! I have no interest in him at all—not in having him as a boyfriend, not even as a one-night. Honestly, where are you getting this? Given a choice, I would pick you over him in a heartbeat.” 

Jo stared at Meg for a moment. Then she smiled coquettishly. “Oh, Meg,” she cooed, “I get it now. I see what’s really going on here.”

“What!?”

“You’re really bi, and you want to be with me *and* Kyo. Mmmmmm. I never considered being with a girl and a guy at the same time, but now that I think about it, it’s turning me on. I’m ready when you are, babe. Want to run downstairs and rape him right now? No way he’ll say no, and I don’t think his parents would mind if he’s a little late. Or should we buy him dinner first, maybe have a real date?”

“Oh, now you’re just being a pig. I told you, Jo, I’m not interested in him in that way.”

“Then! Shut! Up!” Jo hissed through gritted teeth. “Look, Meg, I’ll make it really simple for you. If, despite your denials, you do like Kyo ‘that way,’ then do something about it. Tell him, send smoke signals, I dunno, let him know somehow. What’s the worst that can happen? He’ll reject you? He’ll still come here and keep cooking for us. And if you’re not interested, then give it a rest! It shouldn’t matter who he’s with—Sei, Shiho, or Miss Universe! Just pick one option and stop bothering me about it. God, what’s got into you tonight? You have too much sugar or something?”

“You don’t believe me when I say I’ve had boyfriends,” Meg said.

Jo was thrown by the change of subject. “Well, I’ve never even seen you kiss a guy, but if you say you’ve had boyfriends, you’ve had boyfriends. I take you at your word. You know that.”

“You don’t think I’d kiss Kyo.”

“How did we get to—ok, fine, you could kiss Kyo if you wanted. You’d give him a big ol’ movie kiss he’d remember for the rest of his life.”

“Now I know you’re being sarcastic.”

“Meg--”

Kyo came through the door, smiling and completely unaware he had been the topic of conversation. “Hi, guys. I just wanted to let you know I’m going home now--”

Meg reached up, grabbed Kyo behind the neck, spun him down to the deck, got on top of him, and mashed a kiss onto his mouth.

“Meg!” Jo cried. “Meg! Get off him. Meg! Meg, I think he’s turning blue! Meg!”

Meg released Kyo and sat up. “There! Now, you kiss him, Jo. I want to watch you do it. Make it a real one--”

“HELL NO. Now get off him and get back. Now!”

Meg got off Kyo and scrambled back against a bulkhead.

Jo helped Kyo to his feet. “Kyo, how you feeling?” She looked him over closely. “You feeling ok? Yeah, your pupils are responding normally, so I don’t think you hit your head…”

“Jo? What was that all about?”

“What was what all about? Oh, THAT! Well…uh…pfff…well, y’know…it’s no big deal, Kyo. I mean…you know how things get around here sometimes…”

“Actually, that was the most normal thing to ever happen since I started here.”

“I suppose you could say that, depending on how you look at it,” Jo said. “Now, you go home, all right? You get a good night’s sleep, and don’t worry about it. By tomorrow night, it will be as if this had never happened.”

“Ok. Goodnight Jo…uh, ‘night, Meg.”

Jo waited until Kyo had retreated into the trailer. Then she turned to Meg. “Jeez, Meg, what’s got into you?” she hissed. “You almost gave the poor guy a heart attack!”

“Well, I kissed him.”

“Yes, you kissed Kyo. I no longer have any doubt it my mind that you can kiss him. Case proven. Can we drop this now?”

“You don’t think I’d do more than that.”

“I don’t care!”

“You don’t think I’d actually have sex with him.”

“WHAT?”

“You don’t think I can screw his brains out. You don’t think I’d be the best he’s ever had.”

“Meg, where the heck is this--”

Meg sprang to her feet, darted around Jo, raced into the trailer. “Hey, Kyo! Come here for a sec--”

Jo chased after her. “MEG! NO--!”

8

8

Kyo had just started his scooter when he thought he heard some commotion. He turned and saw Jo and Meg in the door at the top of the trailer’s steps. It looked as if Jo was holding Meg back.

“…lemmee at him!” Meg was shouting. “I’ll spoil him for every woman who comes after me. You’ll see! Sei and Shiho won’t stand a chance! There are boys back in Brooklyn who still dream about me! KEEEEEEYOOOOOO! Get back here! You don’t know what you’re passing up on--”

“Jeez, Meg, if you’re this strong, how come…KYO! GET OUT OF HERE! JUST GO! GO!” Jo and Meg fell backwards into the trailer.

Kyo hit the throttle and sped away as fast as the scooter could carry him.

8

8

Sei said, “And that’s why I received a somewhat hysterical and barely coherent text message from Kyo. And I came back here to find Meg bound and gagged and you nursing your injuries.”

“That sums it up, yes,” Jo said matter-of-factly, “that brings us up to date.”

“Care to add anything?”

“Only that Meg is stronger than we think she is.”

“Ok.” Sei rose from the table. “I am going to go out and go on an epic drinking binge. And if I don’t die of alcohol poisoning, I will sleep it off in my grandfather’s guest house. And in 24 hours I want Kyo to be working in the kitchen…if not untraumatized, at least not feeling threatened…and I want Meg to be calm, and I don’t want anything like this to ever happen again.”

“Jeez, Sei, why not ask me to do something simple? Like take out the entire Chinese army with a toothbrush?”

“Consider it an opportunity to work on your people skills.”

THE END

**Author's Note:**

> I never said it wasn’t messed up. Let the flames ignite!


End file.
